QB Sucker Punch

Roger Goodell calls you and says, “For the right price you can punch Aaron Rodgers in the face with no repercussions.” How much is this worth to you? What’s the sitch?

Now, I’m not a rich man. I’m barely in the green every month. I have things I need much more than this that I already can’t afford. With that said, there aren’t many things I want more than this. I would put most of my disposable income toward it. 

First of all, I would spend a little money on a boxing class and a body bag to really get my right hook as polished as possible going into the Rodgers punch. 

After that I would save up for a few months, taking a side job or two and cutting back on my spending where I could. In the end, I think I would spend up to $350 on this punch. That’s enough for a new iPod, but I don’t need one. That’s enough for a month of groceries, but I could survive on ramen. That’s enough for a new guitar, but I’m not good enough to warrant that purchase. That’s enough for a trip almost anywhere in America, but I’ll get there eventually anyway. 

It’s not enough for a new computer. It’s not enough for a trip overseas. It’s not enough for a graduate school. It’s not enough for the number of guitar lessons necessary to make me any good… not nearly enough. 

My point is, nothing I could buy right now for $350 is worth as much as the Lame-Ass-Rodgers punch. And having the story all over ESPN as well as the 30 for 30 that would inevitably be made about the event would be so much more valuable. I may even get an endorsement deal from some Minnesota car dealership. No question, I would pay $350 for the shot to sucker punch Aaron. Hell, I’d even let him give me one back.